Sizzling

It is the first day of summer in Tempe, Arizona, and for the eighth day in a row the temperature will reach or top 110 degrees Fahrenheit. For Bob and I, this is the sixth day without air conditioning in our home. Apparently, the top-of-the-line AC unit that came with our house eight years ago was soon discontinued because it was too complex; and today, few techs understand its inner workings. We’ve been hanging on with our tongues hanging out because a) we have been waiting for repairmen; b) we have pets; and c) we’ve had our travel trailer as an afternoon and night-time escape zone. For two days, the AC unit in the trailer was doing its best to keep up with the oven-like temps outside until I tried to use the trailer’s microwave oven as well; that simple mistake overloaded something, fried the extension cord we were using to connect the trailer to the house electric; and blew out a house power circuit. An RV repairman restored power to the trailer and got that AC unit working again until last night when, following a swim, we returned to the trailer to find no AC or electricity but the reeking smell of sardines (?), who knows why. Back to the house only to discover that the same strange phenomenon responsible for robbing us of the trailer’s cold air and leaving fish-stink also blew more house circuits. It is Saturday, the first day of summer; and before the day ends, the temperature will reach 115 degrees. Even if we manage to find a qualified AC repair person to come out and even if we choose to ask them to come despite holiday rates, will there be enough energy in the house to allow for a proper diagnosis of the problem or to run the AC if the system is restored?

The events of this week give me a great opportunity to consider the nature and flow of energy. I know very little about electricity beyond flipping switches, pushing buttons, and attaching yellow cords to yellow pegs on computers or stereos. I know only a few physical energy laws or tendencies such as the law of inertia and the law of conservation in a system. But the strange coincidence of so many unusual energy problems popping up in my home these days pushes the limits of happenstance to suggest some hidden link; perhaps, a wake-up call? I’m prompted to trace them house’s symptoms to their inhabitants’ psyches.

Energy makes possible all activity in world. The material creation and movement of goods, resources, ideas and emotions require and project energy. The cost of energy is on everyone’s mind these days as carbon fuel costs effect the cost of food, clothing, housing, and employment. Personal, professional and spiritual energy affects people who, in turn, use it to produce, create, communicate, educate, heal, and motivate others. When people feel “good vibes” of energy from other people, groups, interests, events, they are uplifted and motivated to share in that flow. Someone with good energy is thought to have a kind of charisma that works like a magnet. So, I wonder: if my magnetism is producing effects contrary to the desires of my heart, I have to ask what kind of energy is emanating from me these days.

The first symptom revealed by my house on which to base my internal diagnosis is this: “Lack of Power.” No matter how many times I push the button on the AC pad, flip switches, or even plug cords into outlets on affected circuits, nothing happens. Or, if something happens, it is temporary and of little consequence—a flash of power, then nothing. The same thing happens on levels of energy exchange in business transactions. I asked my home maintenance insurance company to send someone to fix the AC; they did, but the technician decided he could not work on that unit. I asked for someone certified to work on that brand of AC. They sent someone who also threw up his hands in regret. The RV repairman patched up our trailer AC and was about to install a new transformer, but the box of materials containing the new transformer lacked several items he needed to install it, so he had to delay the installation over the weekend which no doubt contributed to the following transformer blow out. Flashes of potential power, promised solutions, but in the end, no effect.

The second symptom is “The Blow Out.” It is a puzzle to us how that small trailer AC blew so many circuits in the house when we weren’t using much additional electricity: no clothes dryer, dish washer, no air conditioning (obviously), just a few fans and light bulbs. In addition, the extension cord was burned up and, eventually, the transformer blew causing the electricity in the RV to fail. A flip of the breaker switch won’t restore the power. Bob has been at the breaker box for hours this week, trying to figure out the problem, but to little avail.

Third, the stinky fish smell and the smell of the burning power cord lends an aura of lingering unpleasantness under the merciless hot temperatures. No power, dreadful smells, fiery blow outs, and excruciating heat. Hmmmmm. Sounds like Hell, yes? Not encouraging signs of a healthy energy system.

So how does this translate to the soul’s journey? It doesn’t take a genius to figure out that the “lack of power” symptoms signal some kind of powerlessness. Perhaps feelings of disempowerment and lack of connection to the Source applies to both of us. I know I have been slow to move into a second career. I have felt flashes of capability, zest and purpose only to fall back into. . . what? Laissez faire? A feeling that I need to be at home for Bob? Timidity, hesitance, a reluctance to move forward? I suppose it’s not easy to fight the laws of inertia when you get older. The months pass in a blur, and I’m still not bringing in any significant income.

For his part, Bob has shared his growing dissatisfaction with our current situation. I think it must be dreadful to feel compelled to take over the role of major breadwinner when he feels unwell and no longer has the location and convenience of operation that he once had. I don’t want him to feel that pressure or take on that role. He says it doesn’t bother him; he’s just angry that we uprooted ourselves from a place he liked only to have to have been unfairly treated in our new location. I know this weighs on him. He regrets the move. He doesn’t feel well. He has lost weight; he’s been diagnosed with stress-related hyperventilation and with iron deficiency anemia. He doesn’t like having to go through so many medical tests.

The “blow outs” that occur between us have become almost daily, at least this week. We have been, as Bob puts it, “overloaded” just like the circuits, and we snap, snarl, make false assumptions, jump to conclusions, blame others for our problems and take everything personally. And for me, some of this extends outside the home to insurance company personnel, for example, who aren’t responsible for making company policy or for keeping me on hold in excess of twenty minutes, but who are carelessly rude in the range of my withering patience and sharp wrath. I’ve even stooped to “flaming” the sender of a forwarded, anonymous political rant—a dear friend and relative who didn’t deserve it . . . . well, no one does.

While it’s easy to place some of the blame for these outbursts of negative energy on the excessive heat, in truth it lies with my/our choice to let such circumstances take control over our minds, bodies, voices, and wills as if we were nothing but firecrackers waiting for a lit match.
Thankfully, the anger doesn’t last, but it can’t be good for our relationships. As to the unpleasant smells and the excessive discomfort symptoms, there isn’t much to say except that Universal Spirit must be sending us a message that we simply can’t ignore. We need to change: not for fear of burning in Hell in the next life, but of making our lives a hell in this one. Perhaps we both need more time in meditation and prayer to recognize that our lives are in Divine Order and that the Power we seek is unfailing and within us--closer to us than hands and feet; closer to us than breathing.

Over dinner, in a cool restaurant, we discuss these coincidences, what they symbolize, and, more practically, how we’re going to pay for a new ac/heat pump. We decide that if we can learn something from experiences like these, we’re becoming wiser. In my heart, I have already resolved to seek out the true Source of energy more frequently and remember to channel its Power more carefully. This alone has made me feel more relaxed, open, sensitive—less quick to argue.

We count our blessings: no fire occurred as a result of the blow-outs; the refrigerator is on a circuit that allows it to crank out ice; the swimming pool remains a cool and clear refuge; and, so long as the air remains dry, we can sleep in wet t-shirts with doors open and circulating fans moving the air over our bodies, provided that we sleep in separate spaces so body heat can’t accumulate. Our poor dog, Joey, manages with shade, water, fans and lots of panting—he won’t go near the pool. Bandit, the cat, on the other hand, thinks he was born on a savannah and relishes every degree of heat—despite his heavy fur coat. He climbs to the storage-shed roof only a half-hour after the shade of evening drops and, as if to mock us, lies down on his belly and switches his tale in a grin.

Coincidences don’t end with the day. At the spiritual center on Sunday morning, Rev. Charles devotes the entire service to various aspects of energy. In the meta-basics lesson, he tells us that recent energy shifts in the universe and on the planet make it easier these days to manifest thoughts and emotions into reality. He cautions us to remember that the law of creative manifestation has two sides. Positive thoughts and emotions projected as energy into the universe have a tendency to manifest as positive experience. The projection of negative rational and emotional energy into the universe will likely manifest as negative experience. Metaphysical laws or tendencies are as impartial as laws of physics. Peace, harmony and love are as possible and accessible as war, strife and hatred if we but collectively focus on projecting those energies into the world.

I reaffirm my resolutions.

In the second part of the service, Rev. Charles offers exercises for physical and mental energy focus, balance and harmony. A demonstration in itself! The exercises are taken from the Dennison’s educational kinesiology techniques called “Brain Gym” http://www.braingym.com. Testimonials for these techniques from the teachers and educational administrators in our group impress us and the exercises are simple and fun. Some people note their similarity to certain exercises in Tai Chi and other martial arts; others see a kinship to Touch for Health techniques. I’m looking forward to getting my own copy of Brain Gym’s Teacher’s Edition and making these exercises a part of my daily routine.

It is Sunday, June 22, 2008, the second day of summer, and the temperature is to reach 112 degrees or more. Tomorrow, Bob undergoes an endoscopy exam; the RV repairman will hopefully fix the AC in the travel trailer; we will begin the search for a new AC/heat pump, and attempt to convince the home maintenance insurance to help pay for it. In the meantime, I will remember my resolution: to meditate, pray, to do some brain-body energy exercises and then go with the flow of Spirit—knowing that which is for the greatest good for us, and for all concerned, will come to be.

And so it is.